Joe is 49!!

Wow. I just realized that Joe is 49. That's our ward number!!! He should win just for being 49. However, I hear of some birthday celebrations that are coming our way. Just in time after the onslaught of mailers from Him that are upsetting everyone.

"In particular, this year Rogers Park celebrates not only Joe More's 50th birthday but the 16th anniversary of establishing the Army, as well as Joe More's 50th birthday. Placing great emphasis on the fact that each of the celebrations ended on a 5 unit denomination, songs and high respects are being organized in honor of these days.

Around the city, high ranking officers from the City Council of Chicago's Armed Forces will participate in various competitions such as ‘The Presentation of Honorable Joe More’ (Feb 23th), youths throughout the city will compete in contests such as “The loyalty vow” (Feb 19th-22nd), “The 11th Joe More Flower Exhibition” (Feb 26th) whereas the ministerial elite will participate in “The Combined Joe More Conference” (Feb 27th).

The Joe More flower, a perennation was presented by a Japanese horticulturalist Gamo Mododeru in 1996. It was named as “the immortal flower.”

On Jan 26th the Chicago Tribune reported that “The 11th Anniversary of Joe More flower will be ‘greater than the past with a combination of ideologies and arts presented in an interesting style.’” The topic of these celebrations is ‘Shining Joe More flowers against the brilliant twilight of a developed neighborhood.'

Since the beginning of Jan 15th, an extra-large sized mosaic fresco (AND we do mean EXTRA LARGE) has been constructed from Morse Avenue and Howard Street in Rogers Park city. This fresco portrays propaganda with the phrases “Our comrade Joe More will be with us forever” and “May there be eternal prosperity for Joe's developers” written across the walls.

This year, it seems that the celebrations will revolve around inciting greater respect for Joe More, using the opportunity to strengthen solidarity of the regime.”

Isn't it all so beautiful? Just like Joe was a little ruler of a kingdom or a small east asian country situated on a peninsula. It reminds me of the fun other cultures have when they live under fear and repression from their leaders. Joe tells me that intimidation is His favorite pastime. He just loves to put pressure on the little businesses and organizations that depend on his feudal sponsorship. Intimidation is a big word and it holds a lot of meaning. It implies reduction to a state where the spirit is broken or all courage is lost. I think the only candidate who isn't using this platform is Ginderske. What an idiot!

For Joe, intimidation means that we get to continue on with the way things are. However, I've heard rumors that Skeletor is already using intimidation and fear to coherce people into voting for him. Joe and Skeletor are indistinguishable when it comes to neighborhood rule.

I really like Joe's latest fear flyer. The man on front looks like Richard Nixon. Last night I laid the poster on my bed (the format was so large!) and I pretended to make out with the photo of Joe. Rodney knows that I have a crush on Joe but he's okay with it because he knows that I'm saving my virginity for someone deserving. And until this election is over, I'm not sure Joe's the man. Or Rodney either. I just have to wait and see. I mean, really, I've only just now had my first kiss. Why does Everyone want me to "give it up"?